Who am I ?

Writing

Who am I? sometimes I feel like I don’t even know anymore, my brother once told me to never lose sight of who you are, or your goals because then you’ll just fall into a empty way of self hatred. At least that’s what I took from what he said to me. I know my habits, I know my flaws, and I just have a hard time identifying who I am. Not my name, it is deeper than that, who am I really? I always tell people who call me “amazing” or “sweet” that I’m not that, I’m just a kind-hearted, honest and sincere person.

I can say that and mean it because; I have looked at my actions and seen that it’s true. It is all true, I care for others more than I do myself, I worry about other’s emotions before my own, I do my best to never lie, and I will always try to find a way to make someone smile because I dislike seeing someone looks blue.

I also know that I can be a sharp tongued prude. Rude words and harsh can come forth from me without my knowledge, but I know that should be logical and think before letting emotions take hold of me. That grasp is so hard to attain in the heat of the moment, it’s like grabbing for the stars at night yet all we can truly grab is the air around us. Yet as children we gazed upon the skies and hoped that as we reached up and grabbed at the stars they were our own, that they were pulled down from the skies and placed into our delicate young hands. Why did we believe this? We believed because it brought us joy, and made us believers in the fact that maybe we could grasp something so farfetched and distant. So maybe I can grasp the words that flow forth from my mouth like water from fountains and grasp some knowledge before I think.

I still don’t know who I am; I’m having a hard time, believing in anything lately.

Even in myself, but before you judge me, or assume that I am weak in will or heart. Ask yourself do you truly believe in yourself? Do you really believe you can do things that you want to? Or do you hesitate and become so self-conscious that you retract within yourself as if you were a turtle? I’m not one to judge, but if you are the latter than maybe you should ask yourself if you really are the confident person that you claim yourself to be.

In all honesty, I believe that we don’t know who we are. We simply go along with what people tell us what we are.

I’m not amazing, because I don’t believe that I am anything but honest, kind and sincere.

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