The Walls Series: Beginning

See the walls are too high. I try to climb and I can’t climb any further. When I see I can’t, I give up and fall back to the ground and stare at the wall. It’s not so bad to be trapped in your mind I suppose. I can see the world in a way that no one else can. Maybe it’s not so lonely here in my mind. Or maybe, I’m just alone and waiting to be saved again? The other side of my mind, I don’t know what’s there but whenever I walk a black shadow follows me and whispers crushing defeats and losses.
I try to run; I can’t get away from me. I bang my fist on the wall until I see red. All of this pain makes me keel to my knees. All of the sins and worries grasp my legs and drag me back to that fucking wall.
My mind won’t let me leave, it won’t let me be. I have to climb out of here and find some peace, you can cheer me up, but I’ll find a way right back here to this wall, this fucking impossible task.
Why won’t you let me climb? Why won’t you let me smile? I am so tired, my fingertips are bloodied and my heart is aching. I can’t fall victim to this insanity. My demons rest on my heart and stab at it, trying to break me down. Break me down… And then…. And then….. And then… I will be alright, right? Will I be okay?
Will I find peace if I let you win? Fine… you win demons, devour my soul make me into what I can’t control


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