I can’t sleep

Writing

I Can’t Sleep
Every time I close my eyes all I see is this darkness, I can’t imagine anymore, I’m too old, I can’t wish anymore that is for the young folk. I can’t hit the snooze button on my mind. I am trapped in this state of deprivation, I feel like my soul has been knocked out of me and all I can do is watch me go. I sit up at night watching cheap old movies, eating cheap knock off popcorn, and feeling a sense of pride in my lack of sleep. I feel as if I am better than the world because I can’t shut my fucking eyes! I JUST WANT SOME FUCKING MENTAL SANITY AND PEACE. The last dream I had, I had a dream of nothing just that same fucked up dream of me falling down from the sky, and I keep falling and falling and falling. I just want to ride out this wave of insanity within me. And close my eyes, I want to go the whole night without thinking about writing something, I want to go the whole night without thinking about the next day and what I am going to do that day. I want some inner sanctum within myself I want some place in my mind where I can just rest, and lay these rushing thoughts to rest.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s